Back In Mexico

I have been in Tepoztlan, Mexico for two months now. In some ways it feels like days and in others it feels like a year. Time is such a strange thing! These have been the most emotionally intense weeks of my life but all is well and I feel a deep inner harmony and joy - deeper than what I have ever experienced in the past... most importantly I feel at home in myself.

Leaving Pucon, Chile without Izzy was incredibly heart-breaking and I have missed him every moment since. Six months side by side through thick and thin bonded us on such a profound level. He is such a part of me now; it feels very strange to be so far apart but we are doing well considering and Skype really helps!

Being separated has made me appreciate how very blessed I am to have someone to miss so badly in the first place! I remind myself all the time that there are so many in this world that don’t have someone they love like this. I’ve also been reflecting on how many couples and families are separated by war and tragedies - circumstances that aren’t in their power to change. Izzy and I are so lucky that we are only away from each other to pursue separate dreams for a time, and if we decide to reunite sooner than later, we can be in each others presence in less than a day. Perspective and gratitude - two strong medicines for the heart!

LA
My five days in LA were packed. I got to visit my beautiful “Aunt” Penny, which always does my heart well. Penny is just one of those angels in life that always “gets” it and never needs an explanation. Her responses are always so spot-on, spiritual and supportive. She is one of my very best girlfriends even with more than a 50 year age difference between us. She has been such a second mama to me in LA and I appreciate her to no end.

My good friend and ex-roommate Saige hosted me. I felt so at home sleeping in my old bedroom and it was wonderful getting some quality “couch time” to catch up. We had all of Izzy and my friends over (the whole BV crew) one night. I was so exhausted I could barely keep my eyes open, needless to say I was a bit of a bum hostess, but it was really lovely getting time with our friends.

I didn’t get to visit everyone I had intended to, but I did see and say goodbye to many. I didn’t get to see a couple of my best friends, Marci and Ben which was sad but they were super busy preparing for Marci to leave for Vietnam to pick up their adopted baby girl Echo which was incredibly positive news! They’re all home safe and sound now with Echo and Feona, their three year old, my doll baby! Can’t believe I missed meeting Echo by weeks after waiting for two years! Marci and Ben, you guys better start planning a little trip South with the girls, I really miss you!

February 20th , it was time to make it back to the airport. With five huge suitcases in tow, one suitcase for me and four for the orphanage, my girlfriend Jen picked me up at the crack of dawn and we were on our way. Thank you Jenny!

MEXICO
As I write this my eyes are welling with tears. I am in heaven. This whole place has blossomed and become even more beautiful and harmonious than it was when I left a little over two years ago. The staff and kids are absolutely radiant. The children have all gotten so big, some I barely even recognize. They speak the most adorable English I have ever heard and they keep asking me "Marisa, you rememba me?" with their precious accents.

My little sister Kaisha just gave birth to my new baby nephew Arayan on the 6th! He is absolutely gorgeous and mama and baby are doing well after a very long and difficult home birth. Kaisha is even tinier than me, so seeing her waddle around the ashram with her huge baby belly all this time was really funny. We are so overjoyed that Arayan is finally here. The kids are overwhelmed with excitement. No doubt he is going to be doted on by all! My dear friend Chris from NYC (who is now my brother-in-law) runs the ashram and orphanage with Kaisha. He moved here soon after I left and I’ve never seen him better - so lighthearted and happy. His work here has taken things to another level and he is so very appreciated by all of us.

My baby brother Jonathan is practically a grown man! Last time I saw him he was still and big-time baby-face, now he is almost 17 and huge. He drives his own car, works with my dad, has a girlfriend, goes to the gym and towers over us "little" older sisters. He is so handsome and just such a really genuine sweetheart. I am having a hard time conceiving that he’s my little Jon Jon - he looks so different now.

I live in one of our adorable little glass bungalows in the woods. I wake-up at 4:45 am to do Yoga, meditate and watch the sun come up over the mountains. (Don’t worry, if you visit, the normal Yoga class starts at 7:30 am!) I am in a silent retreat for a while, spending my mornings on my own, working in silence, studying for my degree from the Global College of Natural Medicine and processing the incredible events that have brought me to this point.

My main work right now is redesigning and rewriting our new web site – consolidating all four of our web sites (for the Learning Center, Orphanage, Ixaya School and Retreat Rental Facility) into one! I can’t wait to get it up and running. Glamour Magazine was here last week writing a feature article on us for their August issue, so the pressure is on to have everything upgraded and professionalized by the time it comes out. 14 million readers – Yay! Hopefully the attention we receive with help us raise funds.

The child welfare system of Mexico has asked us to accept a few young handicapped children that will otherwise be institutionalized. We would absolutely love to take them, but we are currently short support for the children we already have. We have recently lost quite a few sponsors due the economy. In order to take in more children we really need help. Please contact me if you or anyone you know is interested in sponsoring - tashiratmail@gmail.com. You can also donate or sign-up to sponsor through our web site www.tashiratkids.org . We need six full sponsors in total but anything you can contribute monthly towards a sponsorship would also be a great assistance. As soon as we have their food financially covered we can give these new little ones a home here!

After so much non-stop travel it feels so good to have a place to call home, a life of consistency, health and quiet. It was so hard to be disciplined on the road with all that South American ice cream staring me in the face!

Side note: It’s so funny, when I moved back to the states I gained 20 lbs in six weeks flat! So much for the Standard American Diet!!! I lost 8 lbs over the last two years but the last 12 were a killer to lose. Literally one week in Tashirat and it just slipped right off. I’m back at 110 where I was for all the years I lived here before – nothing like having a consistently healthy lifestyle!

Another side note: I almost forgot to tell you… I pulled a Britney and buzzed my hair! Don’t panic, it looks fine and I absolutely love it. I have never felt so free!!! It’s definitely making the Mexican hot/dry season a lot more bearable. One of the friends Izzy and I made while traveling in Peru had shaved her head kept telling me I should do it too and that it was wonderfully liberating. Izzy got on the bandwagon and told me to go for it, but I didn’t want to when he was taking 1,000 pics of me a day. When I got here I just decided to do it! Now his hair to so long and mine is like his was in LA. I never worry about what I look like now; it feels like there is a whole hassle of appearance that just doesn’t exist. I never knew what I was missing, you men have it so good! Izzy thinks it’s the best – he's so funny. He really is one of a kind! My friend Alex says is looks very “ashram chic” – I like that.

Life in general just feels incredibly gratifying, positive and beautiful. The missing element is Izzy! I can’t wait for him to come. I know he is going to love it here, meeting my family and friends, working with the kids and volunteers. He is such a natural at everything. I don’t know what the future holds for us, which is the hardest part of being separated, but I do know that no matter what, we have a gift in each other that goes beyond any titles or roles. If our relationship one day changes form because of different life desires I know we will be alright because our love and respect for one another has no end. We have made each other better people and will continue to do so forever at whatever capacity. I think we have both come to terms with this reality and with that comes liberation from fear. What we have can never be lost or destroyed – therein lies our strength.

You are always in my thoughts, my heart and my prayers. I thank my parents and friends (mine and Izzy’s) for all of the love and unwavering support. Also thank you to those who have inquired about coming down to volunteer. Your help is so greatly needed and appreciated! I am so honored to have such amazing and giving souls in my life. I love you with all my heart and can't wait for you to visit! All my love to each one of you!!!